The time spent with you was one of the most meaningful moments in my life. You made me feel so seen and heard. I wish I could tell you how much you have changed my life. Thank you. 

Love is not forcing them to choose. 

I fear that I lost my soulmate. I fear I'll never be able to love someone as unconditionally as I loved this person. All these romantic films that preach how love knows no bounds... How easily that rhetoric collapses in the face of life, expectations, and social norms. Love is not boundless. Love is not free. Love is not everything we hope it to be.

The older I get, the more I realize how no one cares about me. No one really cares about anybody but themselves. Being the exception isn't all that great if it's not reciprocated. I must supressess my need to love, that way it hurts less when I'm cast away. 

The only person who goes out of their way to make sure you are happy and succeed is you. You shouldn't need validation from people who don't really contribute to that. 

Sometimes I find myself wandering back to that moment in time when I felt so alone and misunderstood. I felt so much pain. I never want to feel that way ever again. 

  I think the worst thing you can do is let yourself get stuck in their bubble. You are responsible for ensuring that all your needs are being met. Don't hopelessly believe that staying inside that bubble for longer will eventually make you happier. It's a closed system. You only find peace and completion when you realize there's something better for you. My peace. 

I had such a strong emotional connection with you. When I see you sometimes, I still feel it. How great would it have been if everything worked out? 

I'm slow to trust, but I love wholeheartedly. 

I see the patterns. The lines and assembly. It's always surreal how we end up are like ants when we have so much agency and freedom. We are conglomerating to the same things because we don't really grasp tge concept of real value. Mindlessly following. Groupthink. The lack of independent thought. It's all very frightening. It's all very dangerous.

What's the point of trying to analyze and decipher someone's thoughts and actions. All it ever did was cause headaches and heartbreak. At times, thinking less about other people translates to self-love. 

I think I may have developed a mild case of social anxiety. I'm not really sure what is actually, I find myself in fear with the idea of opening myself up to people.

Don't always expect the best outcome, and never hope too much to the extent the weight of disappointment feels crushing. 

I think maybe I'm traumatized by what had happened to me. I start dreaming about it, and it's always these stark moments of abandonment. I wonder if I'll ever heal from this.

 I often do not feel worthy. I think it's because a lot of life lacks acceptance and love. 

It still makes me sad to think about what you said. Hearing you say you didn't want anything to do with me felt like the nail to the coffin.

For a long time now, I have been feeling quite depressed with life. I don't really know why, in particular, I feel this way. It could be because I dwell so much on the idea that no matter how hard you work or do your best, It doesn't always work out for you. 

  This is what I get for having my heart so open. 

Keep the mind and body busy.