Changing my environment made me realize how I lacked in many aspects of life. The change brought out thoughts that lingered far in the back of my mind. I have untapped potential. I promise to always make good with myself and shine beyond imaginable. 

I think life is like music. It changes frequently but enjoyed all the same. There's moments in my life where the music was at its most beautiful, there's moments where it wasn't. I keep them all because one gone, one forgotten, will ruin the album.  I have songs titled with people's names. 

I just wish for an uncompromising sense of love. I am not a part of a statistic. I love genuinely, and I expect the same back. 

Sometimes I worry about whether my reaction to things should be a certain way. I feel like honesty can sometimes disappoint people. Today, I think I disappointed someone. Though, I wasn't really being honest. Relationships are so difficult to navigate. I don't really care too much for my own happiness, I just everyone around me to be happy. 

My most profound realization in life is that no one is a special case, not even you. There's a lot of strength and humility that comes with knowing that. The sooner you realize it, the sooner you will be free from disappointments, and the closer you will be in attaining a joy that doesn't rely on external validation. 

The whole concept of infidelity is so odd to me. How can you betray someone you truly love? Is there any love at all if you are not able to commit someone? That's why relationships are so difficult to navigate. The difference in perspectives about each other can generate so much unwanted turmoil. I don't want to give my heart openly because I don't want to hurt and get hurt indiscriminately. 

In this world, I will be nothing more than just a spec in the vastness of existence. Objectively, every action, every word, every thought has very little impact on the way of things. Yet, despite that, there's someone in the world who sees me, hears me, and cares about me. Humanity is beautiful in that way. 

One thing I question about religion is blind devotion. Why do people follow a belief system that tarnishes human dignity and imprisons freedom? Why does society condition us to respect beliefs that promote archaic, immoral, and unjust societal standards? Truthfully, in my mind, religion is just feeding into timelines of narcissism. 

I find it strange that when people no longer talk to each other, their perspectives of each other change. Are we just conditioned to bedazzle people? Hopelessly Idealistic? Hopeful? There was definitely something special about that person, right? Why else did we hold them in high regard? I think if we were all just a little bit more honest and loving, we would see just how great people are even when they are not part of our lives. 

I feel like my energy has been sucked out of me. 

I wept. Bellows of grief from a place I have never known. Sadness from the gut.  The wrenching of my insides.  I wept. Echoes from a bottomless pit of sadness, I did not tire. Days turned to weeks, turned to months.  I coughed up anger and aspiration.  I wept.

Moments with you were the happiest. I thought we were like diamonds. Invaluable and unyielding. At my happiest, I didn't see how fragile that beauty was. I realize that we weren't diamonds at all. We were two different stones, shining brighter apart. 

I am excellent at putting up a facade that I'm the happiest person in the world, with an exuberant lot of people who love me, but to be honest, I always feel alone. It's always a battle in my heart and in my mind. I hope to one day find that thing that makes everything better. 

I feel like I'm just coasting through life, and for the first time in a long time, I think I'm okay with that.

I'm lonely. I wish I could find someone who I can talk to endlessly. I want a partner in life. Someone who helps me grow. A true friend and lover. 

There's this person I find so fascinating. I wish I could talk to them more, but I'm really shy about  initiating the conversation.