Dear You,  I'm really mad at you for not making sure things work out. I am mad at you for making me believe that there was nothing in the way of me loving you. I'm mad at you for making me feel so hurt. I'm mad at you for belittling the entire situation. It's not some small irrelevant thing. It meant the world to me. You made me question myself and everything I have done. You made me question how compassionate and considerate I really am. I just want you back so bad. I'm in pain, I wanted to find peace in seeing you in pain, but I think you just don't care at all. What's so wrong with love? I'm in tears. I'm in so much sadness.

I feel rejected and unlovable. All I ever wanted was to bring light into someone's life, but I guess they are either vampires, or I'm just radioactive. Either way, they stay away. 

If you read me, here's the story... left hanging, I was engulfed with rage and fury for those who take my love and leave others empty.  I told myself, 'Fine, you don't deserve my voice'. I built an electric fence because I took offence. When I look at you. All I can see is all the hurt you brought to me. 

I always censor my true emotions because I'm afraid that people will hate me. Starting right now, I'm going to just say it how it is. 

People who have no regard for others have no place in my mind or in my heart.  

Love rarely works when we are selfish. 

I have been very hostile. Lately, I think I figured out why. I think it's because there was a lack of perception of love. I just felt like the world around me was hostile, so I changed and became hostile myself. For a brief moment, I saw kindness as a weakness. 

I don't know what it is, but I have so much rage. The kind of rage I can't seems to shake off. The weirdest thing is I don't particularly know where this anger is coming from. I just feel it. It's so strong. I hear ringing in my mind, much like the sound of a kettle with plumes of steam. I am writing in an attempt to diffuse all these feelings onto words. I am hyper-aware of the fact that I have been very unpleasant lately. I just want to be calm, to be collected, to be someone I want to be around. 

I know I can use up my time to gloat and be upset, but I push past that because I care. In fact, I jump into what's uncomfortable because you matter to my life.

  In short, I have been feeling very insecure.