The dreams linger. I don't feel any sense of sadness anymore. To me, it's just odd. I guess my soul still carries love. 

I don't understand why people always push their beliefs and ideologies onto others when there's no negative externalities to how people live their lives. Why would you generate so much hate? Is there gratification in ensuring your absolute dominance? It's almost as if hate is a hobby for people. It's disgusting. It's become this hysteria of hate towards different groups. Why can't we just focus on loving? Why can't we just leave people be? Virtuous kind people suffering from the hands of bigots. Free love. 

Doing what makes you happy gives life meaning.  

It doesn't feel good holding onto all this resentment. I no longer want to be tied down by the past. It took up so much of my person. I'm going to lose who that person was. I'm going to welcome someone different, someone better. 

I get pulled back into my hurt like a hex. I remember how my dignity was blighted, and my spirit was disfigured. Evilest are my eyes for the curses in my heart. So many supercuts in my sharp memories. Each one, like an open wound.  State of helplessness. Deserted. Lonely. Drowning into the sand, to be buried in fear and anxiety. To be alone in the death of your soul . For you to make me feel all this evil, and with so much of my good gone, I curse you.

You did all that just because wanted that big of a space between us huh? Am I that much problem for you? You're despicable. 

There's an emptiness about me that I can never describe. For some time I thought it was guilt, but the more I soak in this feeling, it's more like a feeling of dread. A know of few time where I didn't feel this way, though, those moments are always fleeting. There's never anyone that wants hold me tightly. Never anyone that brings me lasting peace of mind. It's uncomfortably cold.