"Be unassuming. Otherwise, you'll cry."
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I think about it way too much. I don't think it's good for me. I fell in this trap of wanting affection from someone who can't give it to me. It's my own fault for not being able to control my desires and emotions. 

I think some time away would be good for me. I'll think about my self worth a little more; maybe think about how convenient I am. Maybe I don't want be readily accessible. Maybe by I don't want to be in this power imbalance. Maybe I'll change my mind. It's all very volatile in my head. 

I have been thinking about the paradoxical concept of making the perfect person wait for you. It's all just so confusing. I guess there's some complexities there; maybe the fear of heartbreak; maybe the fear of commitment. Perfect is infallible and so you would imagine that there's no uncertainties. I guess not, there's no perfect person; maybe better ones, but never perfect. 





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