You must grieve the moon you knew to be the sun.
For the longest time I believed that I needed to find somebody I can raise up like a torch to feel fulfilled. I made it goal. Holding on to a person whose light will guide me to where I should be in all facets of life. I'm now living outside of that belief system. Everyone who I sought out to be my light never really glowed as brightly as I did. I can be so self-deprocating, dependent, and insecure that I muddy the lens from which I shine. Life must be dark when I choose myself over other people. It must be hard to grow sunflowers in the empty lot I used to be. You must grieve the moon you knew to be the sun.